Appendage whisp w/ pie

Poems: Simon Schlesinger // Art: Marki Sveen

Marki - Pies

[advice to a novice in the field]

having fallen face first
into sixteen kinds of pies,
my most enthusiastic reccomendation
is to ensure that your cartilage
bends in confluence with the crust
rather than exercising its attempt
at free vectoral will, a practice
which will bend and sometimes even
crack that fragile form, most
unpleasant of a fate for any nasal
favouror inexperienced in facial pie dives.
of significantly less concern is the flavour.

[Rutabaga Concept Condo]

Imagine yourself inside of a rutabaga
its rooty inward-appendages gangling
about and whisping against your eyebrows.

Rather unpleasant bedding it’d make
but saleable, no? we’re talking total
submersion, which figures show they’re
all eating up. Yes, close your eyes
just to feel. I’ll breathe across your
face if you think that might help simulate
the feeling that Stan downstairs coined,
“appendage whisp” -- that’s the big sensoral
token, as we’ve been saying. But

when all is said and sold, how many folks
are going to fork over their savings, call
up their bankers, saying, “Barry, look,
we’ve got to have clearance on this one
or we’ll never get to live inside a rutabaga.”



Top 12 oddball acts at the 2009 Austin, Texas fest

by Jesse Locke

Photos by Marki Sveen

1. Sun Araw

Sun Araw at SXSW 2009 Sun Araw at SXSW 2009

In his stunning set at the Not Not Fun showcase, Sun Araw’s mustachioed main-man Cameron Stallones (also a member of heavy psych worshippers Magic Lantern) offered forth three extended tropical drone bliss-outs. Bathed in Sunn O))) amp reverb and Farfisa organ warble, he magically froze time like Hiro Nakamura.

2. Mi Ami

[IMAGE] Mi Ami at SXSW 2009

Back in the ‘90s, Dischord-signed double bass guitar/drum-kit sporting, free-jazz loving quintet Black Eyes were one of the baddest-assed bands around. These days, members Jacob Long and Daniel Martin-McCormick have regrouped as two-thirds of the hyperactive, banshee squealing trio Mi Ami, and guess what? Almost equal bad assery, bah gawd. As one of the last acts signed to the sadly defunct Touch & Go, their debut LP Watersports is one of this year's early stand-outs.

3. Woods

[IMAGE] Woods at SXSW 2009

Imagine Neil Young and Crazy Horse reborn as a group of guitar freak-out and psych-folk loving early 20-somethings with some of the catchiest campfire holler-a-longs this side of circa now Devendra, and you might have some idea of what to expect with Woods. Or maybe just Wooden Shjips with twang and falsetto? Either way, these shaggily-sideburned Californian wunderkinds are so damn winning it’s almost unfair.

4. Daniel Francis Doyle

[IMAGE] This is a photo of Daniel Francis Doyle

Photo courtesy of Ben Aqua

The formula for this Texas-based one-man freak show savant is simple on paper, but jaw-droppingly impressive in execution. Step 1: Whip off some blistering riffage on electric guitar. Step 2: Snag said riffs on Line 6 delay pedal and allow to ring out. Step 3: Jump onto drum kit and make like Zach Hill. Step 4: Somehow miraculously manage to sing monotone motivational Gang Of Four-style slogans into a head-attached mic while still flailing like a whirligig, all while foot-tapping the delay pedal like another percussive instrument. Step 5: Splatter audience brains across floor and walls.

5. These Are Powers

[IMAGE] These Are Powers at SXSW 2009

Like M.I.A, Low and "I Feel Love" before them, Chicago/Brooklyn three-piece These Are Powers (featuring former Liars and n0 things member Pat Noecker on possibly the weirdest sounding bass guitar ever) offer a taste of the future. Describing their synth-drum and sample driven, mutant electro hip-hop hybrid is difficult in words that currently exist, so try these: GRAXX DRAZZLY WYBBB QUUUUVVV.

6/7. Azeda Booth/Women

[IMAGE] Azeda Booth at SXSW 2009 [IMAGE] This is a photo of Women at SXSW 2009

This pair aren’t linked up because of stylistic similarities—both play guitars, that’s about all they share—but because they’re both from Calgary, and seriously slayed at this year’s SXSW. At the annual Friend Island day party, the Azeda boys performed cuts spanning their back catalog and brand spankin’ new Tubtrek EP. Stranger and more exciting still, front man Jordon Hossack traded in his trademark falsetto for some bona-fide croons, while fellow band members Morgan Greenwood and Marc Rimmer provided the shimmering soundscapes underneath.

Women, on the other hand, were one of the most hyped acts at this year’s fest, and for good reason. Following their non-stop tour action of the last few years, the quartet have now honed themselves into crystalline panthers of post-punk destruction. With newer tracks like “Diamond Boy” and their cover of Devo’s "Blockhead", they easily outshone the now tragically past their prime flowerpot-hatted fogies they paid tribute to.

8. Ponytail

[IMAGE] This is a photo of Ponytail at SXSW 2009 [IMAGE] This is a photo of Ponytail at SXSW 2009

Everyone and their dog has been barking about these Baltimoreans since the release of last year’s Ice Cream Spiritual, but hey, it’s basically impossible (and pointless) to find a fault in their stupidly fun sound. If you can’t get down with cascades of guitar, spasticus drumming and a cherub-like lead singer hopped up on Pixie Stix while spitting nonsense sound effects, then basically you don’t like music. Live, they make even more or possibly even less sense, depending on how you grok it.

9/10. Micachu/The Dirty Projectors

[IMAGE] This is a photo of Micachu at SXSW 2009 [IMAGE] Dirty Projectors at SXSW 2009

It would be impressive enough just to know that she’s been a musician since age four, has mastered multiple instruments such as the violin and viola in post-secondary, composed a classical epic for the London Philharmonic Orchestra and invented her own kind of guitar (“The Chu” - see photo above). However, the fact that 21-year-old cutie-pie Mica Levi takes these skills and cranks out stupidly catchy and undeniably British bizarre-o pop songs makes you want to pick her up, put her in your backpack and buy her some candy (or a pint). Performing at Emo’s Annex, Levi and her band The Shapes opened for Dave Longstreth's Dirty Projectors, who also ruled it with their fourth world weirdness and Mariah Carey impressions.

11. Talk Normal

[IMAGE] This is a photo of Talk Normal at SXSW 2009

With their awesome atonality, bored vox and guitar squawks, Brooklyn grrly girl No Wave duo Talk Normal conjure up the ghosts of James Chance, Lydia Lunch and Arto Lindsay, even though all three of them are still alive. Stick their Secret Cog EP in yr ear, it’s a real brainstormer.

12. Thee Oh Sees

[IMAGE] This is a photo of Thee Oh Sees

Photo courtesy of Tomlab

Johnny Dwyer and Crispin Glover must share a few chromosomes, because they both get the exact same look of fired up insanity in their eyes and faces when they’re at the height of excitement. On album, Thee Oh Sees are a real cool time, but they still can't quite pound the nails into the coffin the same way Dwyer’s past projects Coachwhips and Pink and Brown used to. Live, however, it’s another story altogether. One about sloppy guitar shredding, spazzy rock ‘n’ roll and you leaving their show feeling like you just saw Thin Lizzy obliterate a backyard BBQ.

Also awesome:

AIDS Wolf, Indian Jewelry, Titus Andronicus, Crystal Stilts, Abe Vigoda, Robedor


[IMAGE] This is a photo of Wavves at SXSW 2009

Explode Into Colour

[IMAGE] This is a photo of Explode Into Color at SXSW 2009


[IMAGE] This is a photo of Ducktails at SXSW 2009

Mythical Beast

[IMAGE] This is a photo of Mythical Beast at SXSW 2009


[IMAGE] This is a photo of Akron Family at SXSW 2009 [IMAGE] This is a photo of Akron Family at SXSW 2009

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